Monday, June 18, 2018

The real truth about that radar dish going down!

Springfield MO. – Rumors have been running amok ever since late June the 14th when the Doppler radar tower stopped functioning after a freak 'storm' crossed the area. Almost immediately some people began to report on what they felt was the cause of the stoppage. One prominent rumor had it that an alien spacecraft had landed nearby and that strange creatures were using the dish to send signals out into space to help organize a full invasion! Balderdash I said. As I had the real scoop. But, I hesitated to speak about it as it might foment general panic to erupt. But now, after some time had passed, I felt it was time to come clean with what I knew.

Witches were responsible. There! I said it. More to the point, it was a witches coven that had set up shop at the Springfield building on West Highway EE near the airport. Sadly, I feared that all the weather personal had since been boiled in a large pot and consumed. Now four semi-attractive evil demons from hell were ensconced inside that white ball on top of a sixty foot tower, doing only God knows what.

Being a man of strong and true fiber, I've decided to wait until midnight on June 24 when the moon is full and then penetrate deep inside the ball and even perhaps one of those witches... Wish me luck!

A sanctuary condo??

It finally came to me that fighting the Left was getting to be a real bore and that perhaps I could become an active participant in the whole immigration thingy. To that end, I decided to offer up my condominium as a SANCTUARY CONDO and advertised its availability in local papers south of the border. I placed only a few ads down there and was overwhelmed with the positive responses. 

That's when I started to do some math. First off, I realized that most, if not all my new potential nationals would not have US currency, but only pesos on them when they arrived. So, I came up with a conversion table to make their early stay in America as convenient as possible....


 It  quickly became apparent that I could attain approximately $20K per month if I could manage to stack 24 Mexicali into the limited space I had available. And, after the first month, I'd already have enough cash to buy another condo and so on.... Of course, I also realized that some people (mostly Republicans) would be a little upset and would be likely to cause problems. So, a full time dude from the ACLU would be needed to run interference and to gain national press attention. America! What a country!

Saturday, June 16, 2018

Random Thoughts for June 2018!

Hail woes!
After leaving May behind, but not before it managed to trash my car with hail on the 31st, I ventured bravely onward into June. A month that reminded me of the variability of what mother Nature can dish out when she's a little pissed. Half way through the month and over half the time the temps climbed to 90 and beyond! As I sweltered in the early heat, an insurance man came over and announced that I had about five thousand dollars worth of damage to my car and that they would be sending me a check in the mail. Swell. Meanwhile the weather people were calling for; heat indices above 100, scattered violent hail storms and just a smattering of tornadoes here and there. Oh, and my condominium complex, which just replaced the shingles on ten buildings at an insured cost of 200 thousand in April, would need to be replaced again. Oh, and by the way, we'd likely have to foot that additional cost ourselves! Double swell!

Chili-con-awesome!
Whenever I get depressed, which had been happening more often as of late, I turn to eating as a calmative. Recently, I made up a batch of DanO's Chili! A dish that goes together quickly with little in the way of fuss or muss. 'Give a man a bowl of chili, a can of beer and a game to watch and all is well with the world!' (Well, it'd also be OK to throw in a winning lotto ticket, a very lose woman and a crazed chimpanzee)!

I can't wait for 2020!
Even as I am rapidly advancing to the age where cliff diving seems like a good alternative, I have to admit to feeling a bit excited about the presidential election of 2020! One the one side, we will have that ornery and cantankerous man known as the Trump! On the other side... who the fuck knows??

 Most of the wannabe candidates are so far to the Left that even old George Soros might have some doubts. Let's see now; there's a few well know figures like Joe Biden, Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren. Those zany characters will be in the DNC hunt along with Kirsten Gillibrand, Kamala Harris, Sherrod Brown and Cory Booker as of this post. Of this group, Joe 'the groper' Biden seems to have the best chance to get it all together. He's sort of a mild version of Obama who, once elected, would work like mad to turn everything Trump has done completely around. That would include wide-open borders, kowtowing to foreign nationals, closing down coal mines and offshore drilling not to mention the reimposing of a billion or so regulations on corporations! That rushing sound, you'd hear, would be trillions of dollars moving back offshore...

Fake news, fake rags and those oh so shallow reporters!

Sure, the picture above is full of it! Nothing printed there is real. It's all fake. Yet, under the rules of journalism that are in place today, I print crap like that and get away with it!

For the record, CNN simply could not collapse...any more than it already has. The outlet has had zero credibility for some time now and most thinking adults know that to be true. Rachel is not interested in men, any men, according to my male intuition. And if either outlet ever spoke the real truth, their collective tongues would fall right out of their mouths.

Thursday, June 14, 2018

Extra Computer Class Added at the Taneyhills Library due to High Demand!

Branson MO. - Due to the high response of the computer classes offered in June through the Taneyhills Community Library’s INFO to KNOW program, the  upcoming Facebook class will be offered two consecutive nights, June 25 & June 26 at 5:00 pm in the Stanley & Elaine Ball Tech Room.  Repeat classes on Basic computer and Word documents along with Basic Internet skills are going to be repeated at a later date.  Call the library to reserve a seat: 417-334-1418

Saturday, June 2, 2018

Kenny Chesny - You had me from hello!

Everything that was possible, at one point in time, fades over time.
And, those you most wanted to send a message,
never fully got the stream of your life.... Or, perhaps even ever really cared.

On this day, Mr. Charles Krauthammer, I've listened to you and your words of wisdom over many decades, and have been humbled and also inspired! Your passing will be brief, as you've already been granted the next level of existence, with honors. Please, I only ask that you give me a nod and wink at that which will come!

Egg on toast with home fries!

One of my very large pleasures in life has been the many egg on toast with a side of home fries styled meal-a-deals I've eaten over the years. And, sure, there are a lot of people who might view such a meal with a jaundiced eye. High cholesterol and two 'whites', namely the bread and the potatoes. Both dietary no-nos for individuals trying to stay slim and trim.

OK, so I make amends by not eating this stuff each and every morning. But, let me tell you that there are some redeeming qualities....


Note that the spreadsheet I threw together is 'mostly' correct. Where it falls down is in the reporting of the fried potatoes with perhaps too high levels of salt. My best guess concerning the fried potatoes is that it is close, while the salt level may be a tad high as I used salt substitute. Lastly, I like A1 Sauce on my potatoes. Try it and see what you think!