Alrighty! It seems the Fed owes China quite a huge sum of money. I
think we all know that. And, it seems that our little friends have also figured
out Mr. Bernecke and his plan to print our country out of debt. So, what say we
offer these little people some honest to goodness real estate that they could
come over and take charge of? Here’s my
top five list of candidate cities to sell off:
No 5 – Akron, Ohio
This city in Ohio
made the top five list for the simplest of reasons. I’ve never actually met
anyone from there! So, really, who would miss it if it went under Chinese
control? Value: $20 billion.
No 4 – Chicago, Illinois
Old Chi town is going down! At least that’s the word on the
street these days. Selling this city to the Chinese would give these people a
pretty decent football team not to mention one hell of an L-train. Value: 45 billion
No 3 – Detroit, Michigan
The Motor
City’s best days are now
in the rearview mirror as far as I’m concerned. Would give the Chinese a chance
to experience some really heavy lake effect snowfalls! Value: 15 billion
No 2 – LA, California
Now here’s a real no brainer! LA already boasts a large
Chinese population with only a boatload of Latino’s coming into that city while everyone else quietly leaves. In addition, let's not forget that this piece of real estate could drop off into
the ocean at any moment! Value: 50 billion
No 1 – New York City
This Democratic bastion of loons, misfits and genetic
hairballs should be offered to China
for free! Hopefully, they would be also dumb enough to take over this royal
mess. It would give them a nice sea port over here and who knows! Perhaps it
can all work out! Value: $1
After adding everything up on the old calculator, I come up
with a figure of just over 1.3 trillion or about what we owe those yellow
midgets. Voila! Suddenly America
is not only out of debt, but we've also has taken care of the Democratic Party problem. Sounds
like a win win situation to me!
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