US poised to turn to Socialism?

'Vote for me, I am totally serial'

According to recent pole, well know socialist Bernie Sanders would defeat Trump if an election were held today!

Wow! That's got to be a big shot in the arm for the millions of recent college grads who are desperate to unload crushing student loan debt. Bernie would do away with those, he says. Who would get the bill? Why Corporate America of course! OK, so what about other advantages of a Democratic Socialist Nation? Well, let's see...

One, an estimated 20 million illegal aliens would be granted citizenship along with preferred status for housing, food, education and healthcare as they would be instantly dropped below the former group of poor US citizens! And, who would pay for that... those filthy rich corporations! No entiendo ingles? No problem, Congress could make Spanish the other American language.

Two, as a Socialist country, the US would be granted instant acceptance from countries like China, Russia and Iran. Think of the advantages, as we partner on up with these fine commie folks to plumber the rest of the world with crappy trade deals. Sweet!

Three, work will be optional! This is one of my personal favs as Bernie promises a fair wage to everyone no matter what their skill set might be. And, if you prefer not to work, YOU STILL GET A PAYCHECK! What's not to like.

Finally, other than a very small controlling central government authority, EVERYONE WOULD BE EQUAL! Yes, the millions of citizens here would all become the same shade of grey. You know, like you see in Venezuela....

So, to summarize. Once Bernie gets elected, things would change pretty damn fast here in the United States. Each citizen would be treated exactly the same by the new government, would get pretty much the same access to food and healthcare and would have a wide choice of government offered work. Yes, a life of leisure with no real need to own guns or go to church, as the government will be there for you, (like almost instantly it problems crop up in an otherwise ideal life).
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One very small caveat (noun: a warning or proviso of specific stipulations, conditions, or limitations). Under socialism, it really pays if you are a close member of the POWER ELITEaka the CGA! Yep, that 1% of power mongers who will live the life of Riley with no limits! And, I can make that happen for you, if you act fast!