A stormy day in spring!

The day began calm enough with partly cloudy skies, nice temps at about 70 and the only sign of coming trouble the very persistent winds out of the east. It was a though there existed a mammoth floor vacuum somewhere just over the western horizon that was sucking for all it was worth.

DanO was sitting in his easy chair, sipping on a cup of hot coffee when the first rumble of approaching doom sounded outside. He got up and went over to a west facing balcony where he could see very dark clouds boiling upwards with occasional lightening flashes lancing out like heavenly arrows. Just then, my weather alert radio went off. Grimacing, he quickly walked over to it and slammed my hand down on a button to silence the pesky device. The room then lit up with a dazzling lighting flash and at that moment he knew what he had to do.

“It's that damn climate change', he mumbled to himself as he went to the sliding glass door of his forth floor condo and firmly closed the drapes. He then shuffled off in my robe to climb back into bed to sleep through the coming storm....

---------------------------

Fifteen minutes later, DanO was sound asleep as a category F-5 tornado sporting winds of over 290 miles an hour tore through the entire complex leveling every building in a mindless inferno of wind and debris that left nothing much alive above ground. The half mile wide path of destruction used an elaborate set of boat docks as the bullseye leaving not a shred of evidence that anything had ever existed there before. But wait! There's more!

In what scientists would later describe as nothing short of a miracle, old DanO managed to survive even after the twister first tore open the ceiling above his bed and then scooped it up to go flying hundreds of feet into the air with a not very much awake man holding on. That ride lasted for over five minutes and ended as the man and the bed were almost gently deposited in a field near a park over five miles away!

Emergency personnel, upon arriving at the scene, were shocked to see the man completely unharmed. And rather than going to the hospital to be checked out, he requested they drop him off at area thrift shop, as all his clothes had been stripped from his body.

And so began the legend of Twister Dan the Naked Man! [Novel to come in the fall of 2019]

Would-be armed carjacker fatally shot by concealed carry holder in Loop!

Chicago IL - A 22-year-old man died after being shot in the head Friday in the Loop.
A 41-year-old man told police that he was in his 2015 BMW when a 2019 Volkswagen driven by the younger man rear ended him about 3:15 a.m. in the first block of Ida B. Wells Drive, Chicago police said.

The older man got out of the BMW to see the damage, went back to get his cellphone and the driver of the Volkswagen approached him with a gun, police said.

The younger man demanded the keys to the BMW and pushed the man into the car, police said. The 41-year-old, who has a concealed-carry permit, pulled out a gun from the vehicle and the shot the man in the head.

He was taken to Stroger Hospital where he was pronounced dead, police said.
The shooter is being questioned by Area Central detectives.

No further information was immediately available.

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Opinion: It is my hope that the perpetrator was not a black, a Democrat, an atheist or an ACLU activist! This could incite a riot in the streets of Chicago as a unjust action by that 22 yr old assumed white guy. If they were both black, that would be OK, as they are killing each other by the dozen every night. [Article from Fox 32]

Three trillion!

Three trillion cells I marshal each day

feeding them all while carrying their waste away.

God did give my body daily challenges, so true

yet, I've lived these many years and was never blue.

Ten years, twenty and now fifty or more

the potholes of life have become a bore.

Still, as I walk daily through many deep pains

I know that God supports me and watches me gain.

My soul, full of scratches and metal so torn

has made me a man now truly reborn.

Life in all its crazy and insane many ways

now grants me deep peace, in my later days.

On the next morn, I will rise and do it all again,

cells by the billions still on the mend.

I'll be ever seeking a purpose for Dan

praying that God has a really neat plan...

CDC: Measles at highest levels in 20 years!

The number of reported measles cases in the United States have reached their highest level in nearly 20 years, federal health officials said Wednesday.A big part of the reason due to the 'misinformation' campaign to dissuade citizens from getting the vaccine.

There were 695 reported cases of measles across 22 states as of Wednesday afternoon, the highest since the disease was domestically eradicated in 2000, according to the Centers of Disease Control and Prevention.

The World Health Organization noted a 300% increase in measles cases worldwide earlier this month in comparison to the first three months of 2018.

"Stopping these measles outbreaks is a priority for CDC and we are working 24/7 to protect Americans from this contagious disease. Vaccination is the best way to protect against measles," the CDC said. "Today, the overwhelming majority of parents choose to protect their children with vaccines, and we’ve seen high and stable immunization rates in the U.S. for several years."

BBQ Chicken drumsticks in a convection oven!

I've written at least one other post on making barbecued chicken in a counter-top convection oven in the past. This post was more or less a refresher for me.

After purchasing a package of Tyson chicken legs at a local market, I was anticipating making myself up a batch of barbecued legs for lunch. The total weight was 1.69 pounds for five pieces at a cost of $2.86.

Now rather than going through very many hoops, I simply washed the chicken, patted them dry and set the oven to 400 degrees. After it reached that temp on the roast setting, I placed the chicken on a grilling pan that had been sprayed with Pam. I then set the timer for 25 minutes and came back once during this cooking cycle to turn each piece.

After the 25 minutes were up, I lowered the temperature to 365 degrees and continue cooking for another ten minutes. About halfway through, I applied some barbecue sauce to all sides.

In order to achieve some browning, I change over to the broil setting for about ten more minutes.

My final finishing touch was to nuke those puppies on high for just over a minute. That was to insure doneness. The end result was heaven-ish. (Q: Does preparing chicken this way compare to outdoor grilling over coals? No way Jose)!

Sauerkraut, wiener and potatoes!

A wiener, sauerkraut and a half baked potato! What a great luncheon idea! True, many folks do not like (even hate) sauerkraut, but I would say to them, 'Sie wären ein mieser Deutscher'! As man man with just a bit of pure Aryan German blood flowing in his veins, I fully embraced the concept of eating semi-rotted cabbage soaked in vinegar! Mein gott!

My other signature lunch time meal, which also employs a wiener, is the Anthony Wiener Pork N Beans dish I created some time ago! (And no, the picture at right is not one of Anthony's actual penis, as I've been told it is too small to photograph)!

This SWP meal, as I like to call it, goes together like a dream in that you only have to bring a hotdog wiener to a boil, nuke a small russet potato for about four minutes, add some sauerkraut and then nuke the whole mess for another two minutes or so. As a finishing touch, I also often add a dab of sour cream to the potatoes. Bon appetite!

Nutritionally, this meal is relatively low in calories and carbs! At about half a buck in cost, it's also kind to the pocketbook.

Library and Lions Club Team Up in Sightful Success!

Capping off National Library Week, Taneyhills Community Library teamed up with Lions KidSight USA Foundation last Saturday to hold free eye screenings for kids. The highlight of the day for children and adults was seeing Mickey Mouse and Snow White, who visited the Stanley and Elaine Ball Children's Library. Attendees were able to have their pictures taken with their favorite cartoon characters, enter a library drawing, and win prizes.

“We were very excited to join with the Lions in this event,” said Marcia Schemper-Carlock, Library Director.  “The Lion’s Club supports this incredible program that provides fast and easy screenings that makes parents aware of their child’s vision and any potential issue they might have. Clear vision, or lack there of, is crucial in children’s development. “

Taneyhills hopes to team up with KidSight again to provide this free opportunity to the community.

Taneyhills Community Library
200 S. 4th Street
Branson, MO 65616
417-334-1418

A DanO burger at the Park!

Forsyth MO. - One of the great joys of camping, for me at least, involves food. Everything (well just about everything) cooked outdoors seems to taste a lot better to me! Weather: Low 70's, south winds 10-20 mph. Sunny skies.

It was still early spring in southwest Missouri and while it was still a bit chilly to go tent camping, I wanted to go down to one of the area parks to try out my cooking skills on a Coleman propane stove. Armed with a plastic spatula, a fry pan and a few condiments, I planned to grill myself up a hamburger DanO style!

For this very modest outdoor culinary effort, I had visited a local grocery store to pick up a package of 'pre-formed' hamburger patties (yes, I'm that lazy) along with a package of buns. In the back of my Jeep was the aforementioned propane stove, 2 propane canisters, a very old fry pan, two hot pads, a spatula, paper towels, salt and pepper shakers, a slice of red onion, some potato salad, romaine lettuce, my special hamburger sauce and a couple of cherry tomatoes! Wow! That was certainly a lot of junk to haul around just to prepare one measly little hamburger! (But, I gotta tell ya, it was so worth it)!

Shadowrock Park

Setup of the Coleman stove on a picnic bench was a snap, even for me. And before I could say 'I'm really starving', I was up and running with a meat patty sizzling in the pan. I was making myself a 'patent pending' DanO Burger! And, while this burger has endured many transformations over the years, I still always find myself going back to the burger basics; good buns, great ground meat along with a few select condiments.

As my burger cooked, I looked around and noticed that there were very few people in the park. One couple that were standing nearby did look at me rather intently. (I'm sure they were wondering what that crazy looking old man was really up to. Actually, the crazy old man was wondering the same thing). As the day was on the coolish side for me (~71°), I was wearing a hoodie, dark glasses and a rather strange looking hat while standing over a fry pan that looked like it was on fire! That couple quickly turned and fled the area. Fine! OK, so sue me. I'm an acquired taste, don't ya know. Well, suffice it to say that the hamburger was all it could be and that I enjoyed myself thoroughly...

Foriegner with I've been waiting!

'It's the juxtaposition of time lines, both in geologic and temporal streams that damn many potential life unions to the dustbin of existence.' That said, sometimes the magic of a true love and a generous fate does still occur! Then the spiritual fabric of this Universe witnesses the birth of a pure spiritual novaistic union, just every so often...like every hundred years or so.... And in the backwash of each life, there are those who were chosen to capture fellow souls whose lives course down the drain of existence.. And then who bravely walk into another reality.... In a universe so vast, all life is more precious than gold. Those who softly dreamed in the womb of their mothers on this planet, never could have envisioned this unique existence. Nor could they envision their individual life life's passages after birth... this train of insane thought will be continued....God bless the USA and please help keep the evil Democratic crud at bay...

A baked potato with sour cream!

Mr. Potato: 'What do you call this thing? Ans: A Final Destination!

As I was in a blah sort of mood, I really didn't want to do anything very exceptional or complex for my dinner. And so, I decided to nuke a small and unsuspecting Russet potato, add some sour cream and just pig out!

The smallish Russet potato I used for this meal came in at just 183 grams. It was washed, patted dry and then nuked in a 700 watt microwave oven for about 5 minutes. After test it for doneness, I allowed it to sit a few and then cracked it open. One tablespoon of sour cream was applied along with a generous amount of salt substitute (potassium chloride) and some black pepper! The result was awesome and very tasty!

 OK. So, about 181 calories... not bad. And, other than the carbs this was a pretty healthy meal!

Notes: As I very rarely eat an entire potato, I drew two 'halfers' from my data file on foods. And the 'butter' I used was also a butter sub. The overall cost of this meal was under thirty cents.

When science and compassion are at odds! An interview.

Today, I have with me Dr. Danomanno Dingo! Dr. Dingo is a renown scientist who has had numerous submissions for Nobel prizes over the past many decades. He's promised to answer some questions, today, regarding America's seemingly endless love with all things science.

Narr: 'Dr. Dingo. Is it true that many of the worlds leading scientist look up to you on questions regarding just about everything?'

Dr. Dingo: 'Why yes, thank you for asking. After getting my degree from the University of Detroit back in the 50's, I have endeavored to seek out only the truth concerning many questions that plague us even this day.'

Narr: 'That's great to know doctor. And please tell us where you stand politically?'

Dr. Dingo: ' Politically? Really? The fact is, young man, I don't think much about politics other than to say that those folks on MSNBC really seem to have their 'stuff' together. What was that program... Oh, yes. Those folks who are on that program called The Five. Why they're just the jam in my jellyroll!'

Narr: 'Jam? What? Let's just try and stay on topic sir. The reason I decided to interview you today was to talk about science and what the enormous costs of doing has done to America...'

Dr. Dingo: 'Oh my, now that's a hot button topic isn't it. Well yes, some science is OK. Bit other areas are really just a waste of time! Take NASA, for instance. Over the past many decades, they've been shooting those crazy men and women all over space and for what. The only thing NASA ever developed out of the entire space effort was the Slinky.. [Dr. Dingo hold one up which immediately falls out of his hand and slinks down onto the floor.] Why did we spend over 30 trillion dollars to develop a lousy cheap toy? That just don't make no sense! What we could have done was house ALL those nice migrant folks, whose a still coming up over the border, for them kind of bucks. But no way Jose! And now NASA is all a twitter over a 'picture' of some black hole! Why heck, if they wanted a something like that, my girlfriend is available to...'

Narr: 'No, let's not go there sir. OK? What I wanted to ask you was just how real do you think climate change is and do you think AOC was correct when she stated we have only twelve more years?'

Dr. Dingo: 'AOC? Oh, you must mean that Alexandria chick. Man, that's one hot Latino. [DanO grins and winks.] Well, that woman certainly has her head screwed on straight! Yes sir, climate change is a fact of life that all the scientists, I know of, fully support. I mean it is changing and cows do fart and that's exactly what I am talking about!' [Dingo stoops down to pick up his Slinky and stuffs it into his pants].

Narr: 'So, I take it you think America should do less science stuff and be more compassionate to illegal aliens. Is that about right?'

Dr. Dingo: 'Damn straight! If we could just round us up all those billionaire and, you know squeeze every penny we could outta them, heck everything would be free free free to all the down trodden in our society. You know who I'm talking about. Poor people like that Pelosi woman. Who needs space? And shucks, now that I think of it, we already got ourselves places like China and Russia to take care of the great beyond. Let's let them do that stuff while we sit back and get us some free housing, healthcare, education and food! Then, we could all sit back and see what happens....'

Tipping. And is 20% enough?

Tipping! A practice which may have originated in the taverns of 17th Century England, where drinkers would slip money to the waiter “to insure promptitude” or T.I.P for short—wasn't embraced by all Americans when the custom began to make its way into our country's taverns and dining halls until only much later.

Now, by definition, the word 'promptitude' means - the quality of acting quickly and without delay. In my view, that is now what it means today. In 2019, tips are expected no matter how tardy, lackadaisical or bad the services rendered! (Sometimes, it's like someone walking up to you, slapping your face and then demanding money for the 'service'). I've always personally felt that the whole persona of having to be tipped just to make a living is somehow Medievalish. As it is, many bartenders, servers and waiters are forced to go work in establishments that offer very little in hard wages, no insurance benefits, tough working conditions, and then which forces them to make up for their efforts by essentially begging!

And, whatever happened to the practice of tipping BEFORE you were served. You know so as to ensure that your service provider hustles a little bit faster than they would for others? Not happening these days, that's for sure. If I might borrow from the Bard – 'Bah. Tis a tale told by idiots! Full of sound and fury. Signifying nothing...'

In America service venues often pay their staff what is known as the tipped minimum wage, which is currently $2.13 per hour. ... But, even when the tips don't make up that difference, service individuals still make no less than the federal minimum wage ($8.60), because the venues are legally required to pay the rest (Fair Labor Act). That's the way it's supposed to go at any rate. So, a person who works about 40 hours a week will make about ($2.13 * 40 = $85.20 plus $258.80 = $344 even if they never got a single tip! I reality, service employees generally do make pretty good tips (17.12% of pre-tax product totals as a national average). And while things could be better, I would think that it would be up to the managers and owners to come up with improved perks to better improve their lives....

Area parks looking good! Shadowrock, Empire Park and River Run!

Empire Park aka Osage beach

Shadowrock & River Run

Forsyth MO. -  A drive through three local parks on April the 5th under hazy skies, light winds and mild temps (65°F) was a pleasant experience early this spring 2019. I visited Empire District Park on Y Highway, Shadowrock Park off Highway 160 and it's sister park across Bull Shoals known as River Run. And while work

was going on to renovate the showers and bathrooms at River run, Shadowrock was up and running and was filling up with RV's! I had the impression that a good number of the people I say at both locations were fishermen taking advantage of the mild weather. The water levels were near normal levels at 659 feet and rain appeared to be limited for the next couple of weeks, so flooding was really of no concern.

So now would be a good time to get down and enjoy all of these wonderful locations. You can reach the park attendant by calling (417) 546-2876 to see about reservations in Shadowrock Park. River Run, when it opens, can be contacted at (417) 546-3646.

From Pawnee Bill to the Moon and Back!

A relatively rare edition from my step grandfather who was also a relative of Jimmy Carter. The other titles that are in my possession are; Great American Cowboys, Re-Tracing Boone's Trail and Little Blue Rose the Cheyenne!