Friday, October 14, 2011

Thank goodness for all that stimulus money!

After receiving money from the Obama administration, I wisely invested in a ‘fixer upper’ restaurant in what is quite frankly a poor section of town. The place cost over $200K, but I really didn’t care as it was not my money anyway! Ha Ha! I’m also told the location is such that if I get in a pinch, I can sell drugs out the back door. Sweet!

Please note there is water only on occasion (corroded pipes) and the sewer keeps backing up after a hard rain. (So, if you have to go often, please try and wait for a sunny day). These code problems were ‘fixed’ by me greasing the palms of the Building Inspector just prior to my grand opening last week.

Oh, and did I mention that the power is off at this time. Turns out the aluminum wiring keeps overheating and tripping the breakers. I’m having an electrician friend of mine come out and removing those pesky breakers. There! Problems all solved.

And, about that stiff out front. He did so not die of food poisoning! Thanks, I'll be lurking waiting inside to service you!

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